i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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