margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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