first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
