Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize