Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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