so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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