Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
