do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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