this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
