Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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