Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
