they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize