me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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