some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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