Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
why do cheetos always look like penises
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
