I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I wish i was in the wii world.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
