he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Randomize
