Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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