so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize