she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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