Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
