i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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