I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
