So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
