I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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