i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
