saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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