Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Randomize
