one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize