ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
