oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
