it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
