I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
