Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
So much Jack, so little girl.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize