He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
