I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize