I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Randomize
