Apparently you make a good broom.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
