you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
