Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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