My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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