I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
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