well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
