i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
tell me about the fingering
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