Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
