Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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