You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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