His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
