But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
