I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
